I think I got "fired" from the scam "job"...

I haven't heard from "Mr Sosa" my "boss" in the Nigerian-style scam job today. Now I feel kinda bad. Did I just get sacked from the non-existent job? And what about those poor fictitious foster kids and orphans? I feel like I let all of them down.  I checked the mail today once again, and the bogus check never arrived. Now, is there supposed to be a check sent to me? Or does the scammer just try to get me to wire him money under the time-honored ruse that "check's in the mail"? He did ask that of me on Monday, and I told him I couldn't. I've been pushing my push-back a little too hard, I think. I started asking him the name of the foster home, and who the director was, so I could call him to reassure the waifs and urchins that their money is coming. That might've tipped him off. My understanding of this version of the Nigerian scam, is that since Craigslist is free to post job offerings, "Mr Sosa" more than likely placed ads in every city, and could possibly have a few hundred "new employees". Since I began questioning him, and giving some push-back, he probably stopped wasting his ever-so-precious time with me, to devote to his other intended victims. Sorta makes me feel less "special". I really thought I was the only one he took the time to scam. Now, I'm hurt. *sigh*
In other Shoehead news, that ultra-hot Barret Swatek has been blowing up my phone! OK, so maybe she's not personally texting me, but her tweets are going off every few minutes. It seems she recently discovered tweeting. During my brief Twitter addiction of early 2010, I had about 25 people's tweets  updating to my phone--some friends, some people I thought were cool and relevant, and some--like the sweet Ms Swatek-- just plain HOT. Since then I deleted all but maybe, two or three of these phone updates. I'd skipped turning off Barret Swatek's updates because A) She's HOT, and B) she didn't tweet that often, so she was way under my radar. That is, until recently. Within the last few months, she's just been tweeting like crazy. And, since now that like, two of my friends update to my phone, every one of her copious tweets set my phone a-buzzin' and a-beepin'. I'm considering turning her updates off, too. I can then tell people--truthfully, but somewhat inaccurately--that Barret Swatek was blowing up my phone, so I had to delete her. Ah, yes! Sometimes, being Shoehead is a burden I bear for the rest of the world, so no one else has to be Shoehead; other times it's pretty damn fun to be Shoehead! I've been Shoehead for so long anyway, I don't even need to put much effort into it any more!
And, finally--I think this is funny:

There! (I feel like this past week of blogs has been a little light, so I'm trying to make up for it!)
Bonus nachos, everybody!

Scammers. Damn scammers. Damn flim-flammin' scammers...

The scammer called me back today, from that job posting I found last week on good ol' Craigslist. I was trying to play it out--I'd called the authorities, and was just waiting for his bogus check to arrive, but I think the dude's on to me. He started out his usual demanding self, and I kept telling him things like, "I'm so glad to be helping these poor children" and "I won't let these kids down". He ceased texting me rather abruptly, so he might've seen through my counter-ruse. Oh, well. I was starting to tire of this cat-and-mouse thing anyway.
The whole thing leads me to ponder--the majority of these scams seem to generate from Nigeria. If these Nigerians are so creative, web-savvy, and industrious when it comes to scamming people, how come they can't re-focus those energies into building a legitimate economy for their country? Nigeria could become an economic powerhouse in Western Africa if they'd take all the efforts and energies put into web scams, and actually create something positive with it. Tremendous amounts of effort are put into these scams. If they only gave it a shot. Nigeria's still a typical sub-Saharan shit-hole. Maybe, just maybe, they can turn the country around. Become the Silicon Valley or the Seattle of Africa. Maybe they can improve the quality of liofe around their country, and maybe the region. At least they can hold their heads high, and say "We built this!" instead of "I scammed some old American lady out of this."
I'm just sayin'...

Send in the clowns... Don't bother they're here!

So, those of you that read this blog know that I have a new gig walking around Home Depot on behalf of the water treatment people. As you may recall, the same day they called, I got a hinky "job offer" as well. This was an "Office assistant" job, that I can work out of my home--basically running this important big-shot's schedule and visiting orphanages and foster homes on his behalf, bestowing gifts to the needy waifs and urchins. This was to pay me $700 per week. Naturally, it sounded too good to be true; especially after the guy offered me the job after the first email! No interview necessary! (Gotta love Craigslist!) I didn't hear from the guy in a few days, and--lo and behold--today, he texted me to tell me my first "task" as his "employee" was to receive a "check" and go "buy toys for orphans". I'm to deposit the check into my account and keep $150 of it for myself! Yay!  What an awesome "job"! Anyway, after an exchange of texts in which he was trying to get my banking information (I gave him bogus info), I went along with it, explaining to this clown how excited I was to be working with kids. I said that several times, just to see if this prick has a shred of self-decency. Obviously, he does not, or he wouldn't scam people for a living, but I digress. I punctuated every sentence with, "The kids need us" and "helping the kids", both to remind the guy he's a douche, and to let him mistakenly think I'm some kind of naif. Too much fun. So, tomorrow, some kind of check should arrive. I'll probably just "return to sender--address unknown"
So, anyway, your ol' pal Shoehead can't seem to catch a break without some clown rolling up and trying to steal my cookies! Well, after this "orphan check cashing" things is done, I have an offer from a Nigerian businessman to go into business with him. He wires me some money, and all I have to do is...